Head Too Small?

God never does the same thing over and over.  He tolerates us doing it, but I can’t find where he does it.  Maybe in some really macro galaxy way, but that doesn’t count.  He invents really weird things to.  And people.  I know some weird people.  It’s quite likely that someone else somewhere is saying that right now and in their head is a picture of me.  That’s ok.  I’m making a point and if that is happening, it helps me.  Here is my point:

We can’t figure anything out apart from God. 

You see how that person with a picture of me in their head plays right into this proposition?  I’m glad for them - that they have the answer they were looking for.

But seriously, life is not that complicated.  It’s complex but not confusing.  It’s deep and infinitely interconnected.  It’s vast and more powerful than we inkle (it’s like having an inkling – spell check let it go).  But we can only describe life as complicated, messy and confusing when we’re trying to fit it into a neat package we can wrap our heads around.  It’s not meant to happen.  We have small heads.  But that’s ok.  Size matters and small works for what it’s meant for.

We just can’t know how our small heads or anything else fits into a plan that was conceived in eternity by someone infinitely smarter and more creative than us.  We really can’t know.  If we could, it would be less and we would eventually get bored.  As it is, boredom is not a risk.  I’m glad for that to.  It means teenagers are in – they hate being bored even though they come by it so easily.

If my point is right, I have a question.  Actually, I’m assuming it’s right, but I have a question whether it is or not.  Here it is:

Why do we value on such a limited scale?

We value time and people.  Essentially – life.  Time and life are the same thing, for now.  Both come in limited quantities.  For each person life and time start and end simultaneously.  And people are the containers for life.  It’s all the same thing in the end.  Why do we create categories and put people’s lives in them and decide how they compare on some scale we each invent to determine how valuable they are?  I’m not talking about the conscious, what you say in a conversation about the value of life kind of way.  I’m talking about how we live and act and choose. 

I do not, much more than a smidge at least, go through life with a sense of awe as I see interesting lives that are so different than mine – different than I expected.  Each life is a complex, interconnected version of God’s interaction with people.  He is revealing and offering something in and through them that no other person is capable of facilitating in the same way.  Instead, I avoid or judge or ridicule.  Hopefully, I keep this in my small head.  It’s so awkward to say what I’m actually thinking.  Don’t get me wrong.  I think this is a terrible thing.  I try to think differently.  I practice trying to see God in people.  It’s just so horribly unnatural.

In fact, I apologize.  Please forgive me.  I’ve probably done this to you.

I also judge and criticize the way people spend their time.  I feel guilty about the way I spend my time.  If I sit around with my family or write or play or rest or slowly contemplate the awe of God in me and the world around me I feel like I should probably do something more productive.  If I get productive, eventually I feel like I should spend more time with God or my family.  The latter happens less because productivity is often valued by the great measurer – money. 

Each effort has a role to play.  Working with my hands and resting both clear my head and allow my heart to breath.  Building gives me concrete satisfaction.  Contemplation reveals the beauty of God but it takes time.  Rest and play heal and prepare and connect.  Work is good, but not too much.  Rest is good but not too late in the morning most days. 

We can only value based on the creators plan.  We can only know the plan by knowing the creator.  That’s the one thing that is valuable in any context.  Knowing him.  I am only content when I am being who I was made to be and doing what I’ve been called to do.  Jesus said, “My food is to do the will of him who sent me.”  I think if it worked for him, it will probably work for me.  If it doesn’t, it’s not a bad plan; I’m just doing it wrong.

I pray that, with our time, we will see the life of our creator - in each other and the context of our lives.  I pray that the eyes of our hearts may be opened that we would know him better as he is revealed in the stories of the lives of those he loves around us.  I pray that our categories would evaporate and we would appreciate our differences instead of separating them behind walls.  I pray that every moment will be valued for its role in eternity as designed by God.

Amen.