Words R Drugs

Bendy Straw

In the midst of scintillating conversation with Mark and Brant at Compass Coffee this morning, the artistry demonstrated by Bryan as he poured life and caffeine into an Orange Ginger Americano captivated our active minds and shut our mouths.  Watching his delivery of said coffee craftsmanship into the not yet twitchy hands of a definitely not hipstery hippie type of patron.  Mark paused mid sentence and breathed with a subconscious sideways nod, “that guy’s a drug dealer.”

I responded as I watched, “Too bad he went into business.” 

Brant nodded.  As an exchange of both appreciation and sympathy all three of us knew exactly what we were talking about.  It was deep with implied meaning, inside references and comfortable, exclusive familiarity.  Most people would be able to make no sense of the interchange.

No surprise there.  Think about it:

Mark, “That guy’s a drug dealer.”

Curtis, “Too bad he went into business.”

Makes perfect sense as a completely different conversation.  It could be repeated over and over and no one would ever question it.  Teachers, parents, school counselors and youth pastors can preach and make rules about it to their hearts content.  They would never come close to honoring the meaning behind the comments we made this morning. 

I could never share with you the depth of connection that occurred in this exchange or all the reassurance, conspiratorial agreement and bitterness that piled up on the table watching the Orange Ginger Americano event.

Mark was referring to artistry and science mixing magically in a substance that would flavor and impact the immediate experience of its participating consumer.  It was a statement of respect and admiration.  Something more significant when given from a scientifically bent artist.  I referred to the sacrifice made by an artist when they turn their art into a vocation.  I know the weight of a too fast growing business and the difference it makes in passion, flourish and experience of joy in simple beauty.  The scurry that overwhelms slow, introspective consideration.

You see?  I have opened a narrow channel between you and I through which can flow information and brief impressions.  Depending on where each end of the channel (imagine five or six of those accordion, bendy straws taped together) is touching, each of us you can see or hear or feel my mind, heart or flesh living in the momentary experience of my life.

Between Mark, Brant and I, having shared our lives on multiple levels for decades, the channel that connects us is much larger, much better connected than a few flimsy straws.  Much more flows through clear and uninterrupted.  The words benefit from the context of time and relationship.  The plain words are augmented by eyes, posture, set of mouth and arm waving (or not).  All have meaning and significance and can radically alter the otherwise obvious meaning. 

We would not have this intimacy without the expenditure of time, honesty, shared experiences and sacrifice.  It’s hard for us to make time together.  We have wonderful families and exceptionally beautiful wives we love, great jobs to do, houses to care for and etc.  We know there is more and we’re trying to get at it. 

This morning was a great reminder of two things:

1.     The power of words is incomplete without context.

2.     Being connected and known is a life-altering gift.

I hope you are connected by more than taped together flimsy straws.  I wish for us all that our connections are strong and wide.  Next time we are in a conversation and one or the other is confused, we can say, “we need a bigger straw.”  No one but us will know what the heck we are talking about.  In that moment, it will be apparent that our straw is just a bit bigger than before…

What weird stuff do you say to your friends or family that no one else would understand?